Strong Mind; Weak Feelings.

I've never been in a Big 4 corporate environment, so I’ve never taken the Myers-Briggs test. I hear it’s all bullshit recently (if they like you they will force you into their group anyway), and I doubt they’ll have a type that indicates ‘mentally persistent, but emotionally fragile’.

Every time before a trip, be it Sydney or Singapore, I get emotionally wrecked.
Old timers here are used to this. That's when I start to bring out the big camera, trying to hold on to something.

“Not fair, I want a camera too,” she said.

And I gave her my small camera.

During our ‘final’ weekend together, I took Hana to a farmer's market to support Satoshi, then back to take mum to work.

We came home and played PlayStation golf (‘I like watching you play, papa’), she requested we have xiao long bao for lunch (Shanghai Street along Elizabeth was the closest to mum), and after that, I took her on a city tour.

I’ve taken so many people around, but it’s the first time I had time alone with my soon-to-be seven-year-old daughter on a Saturday.

First, we went to Daiso to look for a new bicycle lock.

The tour was supposed to be on the bike, but we realised she lost her bike lock at some point between January and last Saturday.

Then we went to the watch shop to pick up a watch I left for repair in October last year, yet, apparently, the service department doesn’t operate on weekends. Great.

The city started raining.

That’s when I found out Minotaur has moved next to Seiko on Little Collins.

It was a completely new world to Hana. Graphic novels, manga, geek culture. She desperately wanted a toy, but I bought her a Disney comic by Carl Barks instead. In hindsight, much much cheaper to get the toy.

The plan was to have a hot chocolate with her at Koko Black along Royal Arcade, but I forgot it was the weekend and the crowd was discouraging.

The Agathe booth was empty though. So canele, croissant and chocolate sables for me.

We then remembered that she owed her friend a giant pencil, so off to K-Mart we went and she also picked a bubble stick.

On our walk back, I asked a family to take a photo of the two of us in front of a plant near the Melbourne Gaol.

Dinner was kaisendon (again!) and we just spent Saturday night indoors.

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Next morning, I made ramen for mum as she went to Japanese Sunday school.

Chicken carcass for stock, breast in sous vide, the rest for dinner.

We tried showing her the Japanese version of Up, but she was scared when the floating house lost control in the storm clouds, and noped out when the alpha dogs came attacking.

Instead, we went to the park and blew bubbles.

Stopped by Asian grocery store to let her try Wang Lao Ji which she saw on TV. (‘Tastes like tea but sweet.’) Return some late books at the library so she could borrow more.

I broke the ice cream scoop during afternoon tea and she told me to look up on YouTube how to fix it, which I did.

Dinner was karaage and noodles. Her adult friends came over and she played violin for them.

As I tucked her in, she told me she enjoyed the weekend.
Please don’t forget her in Indonesia.
She will try to call, but mama only lets her call once a day.

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If that wasn’t sentimental enough, this morning we saw the neighbour’s door open and movers came out from the elevator.

“Is Maria moving today?” She asked.

Due to her health, Maria and Mike have to move to a specialist disability accommodation closer to Mike’s work in Heidelberg.

We knew they were moving, but we thought we’d have some notice.
A going away party or something.

Maybe just the big furniture today, Hana.

“Yea, we still have their keys. They need to say goodbye. If they left without us returning their keys, that means we can sneak in and stuff,” she laughed. “I’ll miss Maria. I like her cookies.”

I said bye to her at school.

And as I entered our home, there was a knock on the door.

Mike was here to return the keys.

They are moving today.

And Hana didn’t get a chance to say goodbye.

I apologised for the crying, yelling, cooking fumes, and violin playing for the past seven years.

“Her violin has gotten so much better!” Said Mike.

I asked if I could take a photo of them, with the big camera, to show Hana.
Also, for them to remember Carlton.
After all, they also grew up with Hana.

I finally picked up my watch this morning.
It’s ticking, but I wonder if I prefer it when it stood still.